Short Term Memory

Recently keep on having short term memory temporary lost syndrome, maybe too old, or because I seldom use my brain nowadays?

But recently always having this experience that day time I got things that I want to blog about but then during night time when I really sit in front of the laptop have no idea to blog anymore... How???

Time flies very quickly, it comes to the second half of November once again... then it will be Dec.. Christmas... New Year... and my father, mother, sisters, friends will all be 1 year older...... But seriously, this year Christmas is not a happy season for many of the people, because of economic crisis, and jobs are shaky nowadays... A lot of people are worrying that they will lost their jobs...

Need to move things faster, really need to build my business up quicker, I cannot wait to see it up soon... Losing my momentum in the workplace very quickly...

When you think you have no value in the workplace, you cannot contribute much, that feeling is very horrible.. If you think you are too needed in the workplace, and you contribute everything, that feeling is very horrible too... But I belong to the first group... In this sense, I feel I very 'dui bu qi' my boss, Meng. I am very gladful that I have a boss like him, and I learnt really a lot from him, and I know it is really out of his heart that he wants to grow everyone reporting to him up to the next level in the career. I meant, if you are working adult, you will know that it is not every time you will have a boss who will spend the time think of a grow career plan for individual personnels under him/her. And my boss got a lot of patience on some of my bad attitutes, of which makes me appreciate him as well...

Initially don't know what to blog, then now like already written quite some words in this blog.. wow... talkative me.. lolz... yes, I am quite talkative if you know me better and off course provided I also know you well enough...

Ah.. suddenly recall what I initially want to blog about today day time... it is about a book I read recently (talking about book again??). Yes. Because I feel that this book has quite a positive influence over my life... At least, during the period when I read about it (I almost finished reading it now), it encourages me to step out in one of the area that I seldom do in the past and indeed, I stepped out. The feeling of the breakthrough, seeing that I myself doing somethings that I never able (or dare?) to do in the past is so good!!! WAH~~, SO GOOD~~~~~~~ HOORAY~~, YES~~, YAHOO~~~~

My laptop has spoilt since last friday. I guess some hardware board has been spoilt in the system. So inconvenience, now need to borrow my sis's laptop to do my work. Sigh, my budgetting figures, my projects' work and data all are in the laptop, totally cannot access.

From this story: it is very important to do backup.

Sigh.. behind every frustration there is opportunity, opportunity of business...

So tired now, the feeling of eager to get something done yet not able to progress fast and felt like got things dragging me back is so irritating...

Everytime under such state, I will try to slow my heart down, it works for me to stay more peaceful in my heart...

Today while I taking train to the office place, the feeling of wanting to write drama script has come back. Sigh.. there are a lot of things I wish to try, but keep on having the letargy heart that brings me nowhere everyday.. waste of time...

Work, work, work, work........ for survival, for the money for the future days, feel so bounded, when can I break free from it and work for the things that I really like in my inner heart????

No specific topic, just felt like leaving behind some footprint on the net today, so come up with this 'Rojak' blog post, it shows that my mind is in a very complex state right now.. sigh...

Living between the dream and the reality

Today is an unhappy day for me, leaving behind doubts in my mind regarding myself... Don't want to mention it here

I wonder if there is any other people used to live in a dream-mindset before. I don't know how to describe it exactly, it is like the whole mind is in a state of dreaming, and things around no longer real, and the mind keep on wanting to just stay in the state of dreaming... I have been very long never in such a state, it is a mind condition that I realized I am extremely irrational and may do things without considering the consequences.. So I keep on telling myself, it is already 1pm in the afternoon, time to wake up!!

Recently life has not been too good, though I am keeping to stay joyful and laugh as much as I can. Remembering younger days, when I am not in a good mood, my face will totally tell. There was people use to tell me that my face is so stern until look like want to kill people. Now off course I am much better in wearing a layer of mask onto my face. The surface appeared to be smiling, laughing and happy, though the underlying heart maybe sad.

Frustrated, wish to be able to progress in things that I am doing faster... God, I need a miracle (and if possible, miracleSSSSS) !!!

It has been a while I've not been blogging anything, even though at times I feel I have a lot to say, may it be funny stuff, boring stuff, exciting stuff, sad stuff or so...

First of all, I am really looking forward that the MRT station that is 50 steps away from my house will quickly complete, it will be much much more convenient to go out for me after this station completed.. By the way, have you seen a mobile bus stop before?? In order for the MRT station construction to carry out, I saw a mobile bus stop at the place where I stay... Mobile because it can be the case where in the morning the bus stop is located at location X, and then in the evening when I was back from work, the bus stop has been moved to 10 steps away, and then 2 days later moved back to location X out of sudden... Actually both bus-stops' shelters are there, but I think the construction worker just hand-carry the bus stand from here to there and there to here, and the bus driver just stop at the bus stop where the bus stand is being hand carried to... So mobile...

2 days ago, my heart is filled with the mindset of being humbled. In the past, I don't quite understand what is meant by humbleness that those pastors are talking about in church, well, not really not understand, but my prior understanding is just very shallow... 2 days ago my mind is thinking about what is meant by humbleness again... I realized being humble is being teachable, being humble is being open and ready to learn, learn in a way that is no objection, that is with full willing heart... I learnt this through contrasting what is pride, for the past X months, my heart is prideful, prideful in the sense that I no longer open, no longer hearing, no longer teachable, no longer willing, but now.. heart is brought down back at least a bit, to a level that is open again I think...

It takes life time to learn how to live better life, and how to be better person. I admit that I have a lot of shortfall in characters, mindset is there for me to think about changing some part of my life... be it successful or not, at least I have tried before. Life is about taking risk, just a matter of whether we risk for the right things or risk for the wrong things.. don't you think so?

Happy Birthday, M'sia!

凡事留一线, 日后好相见... ...

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Today very surprised to receive a phone call from oversea, my hometown.. called by an old secondary good friend. The feeling of receiving old friend's call out of surprise is so good. As time passed by, people tends to forget the old classmates, old buddies, old friends, old colleagues in life, as human's memory normally are not that lasting. We chatted for a while, exchanged for some latest news in life. This phone call brighten my day...

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Anyway, though I am not citizen of China, but I would also like to express my personal encouragement to Liu Xiang, the track and field athlete of China who injured and forced to bail out from the 2008 Olympics Games.

I am thinking: Olympics represents the highest level of events for many sports and getting gold in it meant a lot to athletes. If it becomes a life meaning to Liu Xiang to achieve his best in this competition, then how much this incident will impact him is not hard to imagine. Suddenly a long waited dream is broken, and 4 years of hard training and efforts becomes like useless and meaningless... It is a very sad thing to the athlete himself... Anyway, wish him be able to stand up again as meaning of life is still not lost, and he still has chance. Important thing is not to give up or let this incident become a bad influence to achieve the next target in life...

加油, 刘翔!

Haha, suddenly feel like writing all this to the air, as I don't know this athlete.. But anyway, is a sharing and encouragement to my friends who encounter similar type of event in life too...

加油, 朋友们!